He’s still my boy.

While my son is now more man than boy, every so often the boy in him comes through. About a week ago I had gone to bed leaving my son and husband up. I think they were playing Ace Combat or something like that so I turned in. A little while later my husband came to bed and I asked if Cody had gone to bed as well. He told me no, he fell asleep on the chair so I just left him there. Cody had done this before so I knew he was warm and comfortable so I rolled over and went back to sleep. A few hours later I was awakened by something. At first I didn’t know what it was and then I realized the light in the hallway was on and that was odd. I assumed that my daughter had gotten up to go to the bathroom and forgot to turn it off. I got up to turn it off and noticed her door was closed so I knew it was not her. I looked in Cody’s room thinking that he might have gotten up and gone to his own bed but it was empty so I called his name to see where he might be. I was answered with a very pathetic voice calling weakly, “Mom I’m out here.” I went to the family room and there he was face down on the couch with long bare legs hanging to the floor. “I’m sick.” he moaned. I asked what hurt and where he felt bad. He told me it was his head and he was achy all over. I went over to him and touched his back. Even through his shirt I could feel him burning up. He was indeed sick. I told him I was going to get the thermometer and some ibuprofen and I would be right back. He said ok. I took his temperature and it was 102. After dosing him with something for the fever and body aches I got his dad up to help me get our boy to his bed. And that’s where he spent most of the rest of the weekend except when he was on the couch. He may be a tall strapping young man but when he gets sick he’s still my little boy.

It was while he was recovering from what we are pretty sure was the flu that we found out that his school was offering ballroom dance lessons to any one who was interested before the school dance that Friday. I told him I thought it was as good idea since if the girls were making an effort to learn how to dance they would really appreciate it if some of the boys would as well. He told me he was planning on looking up dancing on Wikipedia and I suggested he might learn more by taking the class and he reluctantly agreed. However after his first lesson he was hooked. When he came home I asked him if he had fun dancing and he said yes. I asked him if he got to hold a girl in his arms and he said several. He really enjoyed the lesson and even said that if another opportunity came up for more lessons he probably would take them. That boy is no fool. He and his dad went shopping for a new dress shirt and he picked out a very handsome red shirt which he wore with black pants and a black tie. He looked so handsome. Later when he came home from the dance I asked how it was. He told me he had a good time and had danced with several of the girls. He also mentioned that he was way overdressed, but that he was glad he had dressed nicely.

While I am so proud of the man he is becoming I still find myself looking at him in amazement. When he was a baby he was just a little peanut starting out at only four pounds and now he is almost as tall as I am. When he was just born and my mom saw him for the first time she looked at my husband and said, “You couldn’t deny him if you wanted to.” He did look just like his daddy but the older he gets the more he looks like my side of the family. He is getting tall, slender and strong. He even has the McKibben feet; long and narrow. This is much different than the Johnson feet which look very much like Flintstone feet. Sometimes he will catch me staring at him and he will say what? I will tell him I am just looking and he will tell me stop because I am creeping him out but what he doesn’t know is that is am looking for my baby, the one I cradled on my chest as we napped together. I realize that the days that I know everything about him are gone and will only know what he chooses to share with me. In not so many years he will be on his own with his very own family and some other woman will be first in his life and that is the way it should be. I just hope that when that day comes I can let go of him without too many tears. Thank goodness he is only thirteen years old and I still have many more years where he still my boy.